The AAC Guide to Embarrassing Yourself During Freshers’ Week

2012-09-20 11:32 AMStudent Life

 

 

 

“Yeah, believe it or not, that was me aged 18. That kid in the white-tac glasses was legally allowed to vote, drive a car and even adopt children.

 

Freshers’ Week was awesome. Not since I was five have I been able to walk up to strangers and start chatting away with such ease or lack of embarrassment. I’d jump at the chance to relive my Freshers’ Week again. There’s been nothing like it since and I doubt there will be ever again. My advice would be to talk to everyone, be yourself and don’t do anything that is going to stick with you for the next three or four years (or, potentially, life)…”

 

 

 

 

 

“The first person I met at university during Freshers’ Week was an unassuming chap called Norris; a gentle giant with a penchant for corduroy blazers. He had just moved into the room across from me in student halls. I shook his hand and introduced myself. After removing his feeble hand from my ‘confident’ grip, he told me his name. He said something almost inaudible, but I heard the name “Norris”, and I was quite happy with it. “Nice to meet you, Norris! What course are you studying, Norris? Where are you from, Norris?”

 

As it turns out, he wasn’t actually called Norris. He was just far too polite/scared to correct me. I didn’t find this out, however, until my final year. We were never friends, but throughout my first year, whenever I saw him, I’d say something friendly like “Hey Norris! How’s it going?” and he’d nod nervously before shuffling into his room. Even in my second year and third year, I’d see him on campus or in the SU and greet him with a resounding shout of “Hey Norris!”

 

One day he cracked: “My name isn’t Norris. It’s Lawrence. L-A-W-R-E-N-C-E.”

 

My response?

 

“Sorry, Norris.”

 

Some habits are hard to break.”

 

 

 

 

 

“When I started university, I was keen to reinvent my look and so I decided to experiment with hair dye and a pair of scissors. As you can see from the photo, it was a total and utter disaster! Where do I start? The terrible cut of the fringe, the length of the fringe, the pre-GHD frizzyness or the Pepto-Bismol pink hair dye? Don’t even get me started on the bright blue eye-shadow with my green eyes… It’s safe to say, the look didn’t last long! Although now it will be immortalised in AllAboutCareers.com history for ever more, cringe!”

 

 

 

 

 

“I’ll be honest. Alcohol. There isn’t really any other explanation. People tell you that you must respect the power of the sea: approach it with caution, restraint and due regard. The same can also be said for “Snakebite”. A truly evil concoction, concealed by the sweet taste of Ribena to coax unwitting “cleanshirts” into situations such as documented in the picture above.

 

The two dishes in the front? My unfortunate housemates who were about to embark on ten months of attrition at the hands of a kid who had just learnt that his mum and dad weren’t around, his student loan actually could go a long way and dignity, at times, can be really quite overrated. Coincidently, this photo is also the last documented sighting of that suit jacket. I really did actually like it. Shame.”

 

 

 

 

 

“Oh. Dear. Words fail me. I want to reach right into the photo, grab my past self and shake her by the shoulders. What in God’s name was I thinking? Since when is a gender bending, glam rock pirate ever a good fancy dress choice?

 

A fake, plush beard might have made me look like a Shoreditch pirate, but no, I let my (admittedly pretty good looking) flatmate beard me up using my expensive YSL eyeliner. That patchy pervert beard cost me £4 worth of eyeliner. I look like George Michael in a wig.

 

I learnt two things during Freshers’ Week:

 

1. Never let a potential romantic interest draw a beard on you. It sends mixed messages.

 

2. Buy cheaper eyeliner.”

 

 

 

 

 

"I remember being quite nervous. I had so many questions: I won't know anyone, will I fit in? What will it all be like? WHAT WILL I WEAR?!

 

Dressing up always makes me feel better, so I decided to wear the boldest shirt in my wardrobe. It was melon pink in colour with white vertical stripes. I wore it with a pair of charcoal coloured skinny denim shorts (Australian Freshers’ Week is in March, the end of our summer, so no, I am not one of those people who think it's ok to wear shorts in winter) and a pair of black wing tipped brogues.

 

On the day, I treated myself to a greasy bacon and egg muffin, as well an extra-large double shot caramel soya latte and the largest chocolate chip cookie you've ever seen. In hindsight, probably not the best idea considering the butterflies, which felt more like large birds flapping about inside me. 

 

Really, I don't know why I was fretting so much. Pretty much everyone was in the same boat; some were even more nervous than me. Truly, university was one of the most memorable times of my life! The best part was meeting like-minded people who just get you."