Freshers’ Week: 14 Ways to Introduce Yourself

2012-09-14 05:13 PMStudent Life

When you meet people for the first time during Freshers’ Week, you’ll probably end up saying the same thing over and over again. You’ll tell them your name, where you’re from and what course you’re studying. After a while, it might get boring. Fortunately, we’ve come up with a few ideas to help you mix it up a bit. Try these bad boys out and you’ll go down in history as a complete legend and/or “that really weird kid from halls”…

“Please be my friend.”

“Hey! My name’s Claudio. I’ve been stalking you since birth.”

“Let me stop you there. I know what you’re thinking. But no, I’m not Goose from Top Gun.”

“Just shut up and kiss me.”

“Hello! Is it me you’re looking for? I can see it in your eyes. I can see it in your smile. You’re all I’ve ever wanted. And my arms are open wide.”

“Hello. My name’s Sarah. But my friends call me The Admiral.”

“Stop! Hammer time.”

“Pinch me. I must be dreaming. I can’t believe we’re finally here. It’s sooooo glorious. Pinch me again. I liked it when you did that.”

“Please be my friend.”

“Hey! My name’s Alan. Do you like Pocahontas?”

“Wait! Don’t tell me. Your name is…Re-bec-ca. You’re from…erm…Hertfordshire. And you’re studying…hold on, I’ve almost got it…French and Linguistics. Ok, how did I do?”

“Wow! You’re, like, really sweaty!”

“Your eyes are like limpid pools of primordial ooze, and I am the protozoa that wish to swim in their depths."

“I see dead people.”

“Have you met Mr Ted? Say hello to Mr Ted. Say it.”

“Do you want a cream cracker? Pink wafer? Chocolate éclair? Custard cream? Bakewell tart? Rum baba? Hot milk cake? No? I’ll give you a ginger nut if you Facebook friend me.”

Disclaimer: Ignore all of the above. This is terrible advice. But you knew that already, because you’re not a complete idiot.

Image courtesy of Michael 1952, ‘Tony and I Demonstrate Cub Scout Handshake’